"I was with someone — this was somebody I lived with, for all intents and purposes my husband. We had embryos together, this was my person,'" the actress, 37, explained to Dax Shepard during an episode of his "Armchair Expert" podcast, which was posted on Monday, January 9.
Kendrick recalled how "six years" into the relationship, she realized something was wrong.
"I remember telling my brother, when things had first kind of gone down, 'I'm living with a stranger. Like, I don't know what's happening,'" she said. "It wasn't just the 'Oh, I'm losing a relationship.' It was that I believed that if we broke up or, you know, if he left basically, it was a confirmation that it's because I'm impossible, I'm lucky that he's even tolerating my bulls—t."
According to the Pitch Perfect star, she made numerous attempts to make things work with her ex through couples therapy. Kendrick noted that toward the end of their relationship, the unnamed partner revealed he had feelings for someone else.
"There was an inherent thing of me being so rejectable that this person who loved me very deeply for six years, it suddenly occurred to him, how awful I was or something," she added. "The shame, that lingers much longer."
The Maine native continued: "I did start going to Al-Anon while all this was going on. I mean, look, I truly dismantled my life, and at first, that was as a reaction to the accusation that I was crazy, and I was the one causing the problem. So, I had a conversation with CAA, my agency and said I need to take time off, I have a mental health problem."
For the Noelle star, it was important to put herself first amid the major life change.
"I started seeing two therapists a week and I started trying to learn to meditate and I got into Al-Anon," Kendrick shared. "And all of these things ended up being very wonderful things for me in the long run, but initially went into them thinking, 'Tell me how to stop being crazy. Tell me how to stop feeling anything.'"
The Emmy nominee previously dated director Edgar Wright for four years from 2009 to 2013. After being briefly linked to Jake Gyllenhaal, Kendrick later moved on with Ben Richardson for several years.
In January 2022, Us Weekly confirmed that Kendrick was dating Bill Hader after they worked together in the past. "They're really into each other and make each other laugh — a lot," a source told Us at the time. "They're keeping their relationship private, but friends close to them know."
Six months later, the pair pulled the plug on their romance.