7 outrageous things filmmaker John Waters said during the Rancho Mirage Writers Festival

Legendary filmmaker John Waters — the mind behind cult classics "Multiple Maniacs," "Pink Flamingos" and "Hairspray" — has also made a name for himself in the literary world with books "Liarmouth and "Carsick: John Waters Hitchhikes Across America," among others.

But instead of diving into his written work during his appearance at the 10th annual Rancho Mirage Writers Festival on Wednesday, Waters treated his time on stage as a standup comedy bit, discussing politics, the LGBTQ community, relationships and health.

Here are some of the most memorable moments from his presentation.

1. When he discussed the 'nonbinary sexual revolution'

Waters said many aspiring writers ask him what they should write about to shock people, and he said there's plenty of inspiration to be found with the "new nonbinary sexual revolution."

"They've done the unthinkable: They've made the right wing crazy, but they scandalized the left wing too, and so they made me a middle-of-the-road maniac, something I never thought could happen," Waters said. "This new trans movement is here, it's not queer, and nobody's used to it, so start writing about it."

Waters, an avid supporter of gay rights, said the film "Myra Breckinridge" and the book "Last Exit to Brooklyn," both involving trans characters, were huge influences on him. But, in his opinion, it seems like trans people have been accepted very quickly in society compared to the long fight for gay rights. He recalled a conversation he had with a friend of his who said his two children, ages 9 and 11, were trans. When Waters asked how they knew, his friend said, "Well, they just came back from trans summer camp."

"This got accepted in a year, it took gay rights three centuries. Am I wrong to laugh when I hear a Republican say to their trans kids, 'Can't you just be gay?'" he said.

2. When he wondered if the late Tennessee Williams still 'gets horny'

The filmmaker wondered if it's OK to have a type anymore. But regardless, at this point, he's not entirely sure who his type would be. One candidate is Johnny Rio from "City of Night," a character from John Rechy's novel.

Waters brought up "lovemaps," a concept by sexologist John Money, which states that people are born with a type they'll be attracted to forever.

"So my type, who could it be today? Maybe Harry Crews' last male groupie that doesn't know he's dead. Or a plumber who shows crack but isn't on it," Waters said.

He also wondered if someone could have a dead type. "Does Tennessee Williams ever get horny down there 10 feet under?" he asked.

3. When he acknowledged both sides of the political aisle

Politics is on everyone's mind in 2024 as the United States gears up for another presidential election. Waters said he tries to stay on top of the news, reading the Wall Street Journal's editorials every day "to see how the smartest people I don't agree with think," and the New York Post's editorials "to see how the dumbest people I don't agree with think."

"Sometimes the dumbest ones are more fun to read. The worst headline the New York Post ever did, when Ike Turner died, the headline was, 'Ike beats Tina to death,'" he said, with the crowd erupting into laughter.

Waters said he tries to see both sides of the political aisle on certain issues, even if he doesn't agree with both sides. One example he brought up was the Colorado baker who refused to make a wedding cake for a gay couple due to religious beliefs.

"If someone came to me from Fred Phelps' Westboro Baptist Church and asked me to do a cake that said '(Expletive) must die' on it, I'd say no," he said. "Couldn't they find a gay baker in Denver? There's so many."

He also briefly discussed reparations. He believes it should go further and apply to Japanese people who were put in internment camps during World War II, women who were paid less and gay people who went to jail for their sexuality. "Just make white men not be able to have sex for a year and pay for everything and see what happens," he said.

Waters also believes people need to pick their battles better.

"Why are liberals that shocked that some people are uptight about drag kindergarten classes? At the Academy Museum, they have an amazing show of mine up right now. They made this announcement they were going to have drag kindergarten hour to teach the kids about my films. I said, 'Are you (expletive) crazy? Fox News will call,'" he said. "My drag queens are made to scare adults, not comfort children."

4. When he said cults are 'very important'

Waters believes cults are "very important" and society needs more of them.

"I want to have happy cults like Jonestown with a happy ending, where it's all writers whose books have been canceled from sensitivity editors, and Bruce Wagner comes in and saves them all," Waters said.

He joked that today's cult members wouldn't be able to carve Xs into their foreheads like Charles Manson's followers did because "somebody would think you were a high executive at Twitter," because the social media platform is now known as X.

"Maybe we'd be the fancy Manson family, the gay one," he continued. "They don't leave something witchy, they leave something b-----."

5. When he claimed he only gets high from COVID shots

Staying healthy is very important to Waters, who said he only gets high with COVID-19 shots, which he's apparently had 26.

He half agrees with PETA, and he "only eats animals with ugly faces to spare them bullying on the barnyard." But if someone's really hungry, he advises them to do what supermodels do, which is eat paper towels soaked in water.

Waters said he exercises regularly, which includes 20 sit-downs while writing every day and 100 push-aways of fans who bring him pirated Etsy products.

When it comes to hydration, he's addicted to Evian.

"I keep saying, 'Where is this well? How come I've never seen a picture of it?" he said. "I was in Switzerland and I said, 'Let's go,' and they said, 'You can't go.' Why? Because it's a garden hose in Chernobyl."

6. When he pointed out the importance — and weight — of punks

"Why aren't the punks included in diversity in writing? Waters asked. "Why don't they crash this festival? We could have punk literary drag queens."

Every year, Waters hosts Mosswood Meltdown, a punk rock festival in Oakland. To him, "punks are very important," but they're getting older.

"You say to people, 'Are you a skinhead or bald?" he said. "They stage dive, but they're heavy now, so people drop them."

7. When he wondered aloud if his movies could be made today

Waters isn't sure he could have a career and make his movies in today's politically correct climate. Movies with the title "Hag in a Black Leather Jacket," or with the quote, "Happy birthday, fatso," from "Pink Flamingos" would most likely not be accepted.

"You're not allowed to say 'fat' anymore. You can say 'f---' on national television, but you can't say 'fat' on PBS," he said.

One way he could make it work, he said, is by moving to France because "they like crazy Americans there" and remaking his films. "Pink Flamingos" would be directed by Bruno Dumont and star Béatrice Dalle and Gérard Depardieu as the Egg Lady. For "Female Trouble," he envisions François Ozon remaking the film with Lily-Rose Depp as Divine's character.

Ema Sasic covers entertainment and health in the Coachella Valley. Reach her at ema.sasic@desertsun.com or on Twitter @ema_sasic.

This article originally appeared on Palm Springs Desert Sun: John Waters' 7 wildest moments at the Rancho Mirage Writers Festival