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26 Witty One-Liners In Christopher Guest Movies That Still Make Me Laugh

Hugh Scott

May 22, 2024 at 12:45 PM

It's such a fine line between stupid and clever...

"Oh, no! That's the good card!" - Best In Show

"And to think that in some countries these dogs are eaten." - Best In Show

"You can't throw the baby out with the bathwater because then all you have is a wet, critically injured baby." - For Your Consideration

"Dozens of people spontaneously combust each year. It's just not really widely reported." - This Is Spinal Tap

"I'd hate to go on a date with Judge Edie Franklin and have her judge me, that'd be no fun." - Best In Show

"If there's an empty space, just fill it with a line, that's what I like to do. Even if it's from another show." - Waiting For Guffman

"I thought maybe they shrunk you down or something." - Mascots

"I believe virtually everything I read, and I think that is what makes me more of a selective human than someone who doesn't believe anything." - This Is Spinal Tap

"Someone's killed their children and made them into cookies, and I want to go see that." - For Your Consideration

"You know, if they didn't have the model train, they wouldn't have gotten the idea for the big trains." - A Mighty Wind

"There was abuse in my family, but it was mostly musical in nature." - A Mighty Wind

"Yeah. I wouldn't worry about it though, it's not a big college town." - This is Spinal Tap

"It's such a fine line between stupid, and… clever" - This Is Spinal Tap

"Man, I tell you something, if you live in my neighborhood and you're dressed like that, you'd better be a hotel doorman." - Best In Show

"It's like, how much more black could this be? And the answer is none. None more black." - This Is Spinal Tap

"We could talk or not talk forever and still find things to not talk about." - Best In Show

"We consider ourselves bi-costal if you consider the Mississippi River one of the coasts." - Waiting For Guffman

"The numbers all go to eleven" - This Is Spinal Tap

"We're gonna be in Philadelphia for 48 hours, how many tea services can you do?" - Best In Show

"We met at Starbucks. Not at the same Starbucks but we saw each other at different Starbucks across the street from each other." - Best In Show

"I'll always have a place at the Dairy Queen." - Waiting For Guffman

"People say, 'You must have been the class clown.' And I say, No, I wasn't. But I sat next to the class clown, and I studied him." - Waiting For Guffman

"You can't really dust for vomit." - This Is Spinal Tap

"I used to be able to name every nut that there was." - Harlan Pepper

"He went for her like she's made outta ham." - Best In Show

"Kids don't like eating at school, but if they have a Remains of the Day lunchbox they're a lot happier." - Waiting For Guffman

It's such a fine line between stupid and clever...

Christopher Guest has been in charge of some of the funniest movies of the last 50 years, and a big part of what makes them so great is how quotable they are. Waiting for Guffman, Best in Show, A Mighty Wind, For Your Consideration, and Mascots all have lines that I bounce back and forth with my friends all the time, not to mention one movie he didn't direct that might have the most of all, This is Spinal Tap.

Sony Pictures

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Christopher Guest and his crew of genius actors have provided some of my most cherished one liners.

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