21 TV Characters We’d Like to Have a Drink With

What could be better than spending an evening at Moe’s with Homer, Barney, Carl, and Lenny having a Duff? Or maybe a Duff Dry, or a Duff Lite, or maybe even a Duff Adequate?
Best Line: Homer: “No TV and no beer make Homer something something.” Marge: “Go crazy?” Homer: “Don’t mind if I do! [Freaks out.]”

(Photo: Fox)

There may be no drunk on television who is more fun than Tyrion Lannister. Part of it may be because so many awful things happen around and to him, but mostly he’s just hilarious. There is no question that a show that was only about Tyrion and Bronn getting drunk in a brothel would set new rating records for HBO.
Best Line: “I am the god of tits and wine!”

(Photo: HBO)

While he might not enjoy drinking with us — his perfect birthday party is a steak dinner, a bottle of scotch, and The Bridge on the River Kwai alone — we could learn so much about manliness just by spending a little time with him over a glass of Lagavulin 16.
Best Line: “Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets.”

(Photo: NBC)

Nobody makes a glass of wine feel like a Caribbean vacation better than Olivia Pope. When your day is filled with murders, cover-ups, and conspiracies at the highest levels of government — all under the watchful eye of the media — a bottle (or two) of fine wine can be your best friend.
Best Line: “I don’t want to talk. I want to eat too many fries and drink way too much wine and have a relaxing evening.”

(Photo: ABC)

For nine years, the gang at MacLaren’s Pub proved to be the best of drinking buddies — none more so than the Suited One himself. Unless, of course, you have a bottle of expensive Glen McKenna — they have a tendency to drop those.
Best Line: “See that woman nursing a Black Russian? She’s about to chase that with a White American.”

(Photo: CBS)

The ultimate drinking buddy. Long after we’ve uploaded our brains into the cloud and no longer eat or drink, we’ll watch old episodes of Cheers and want to share a beer with Norm. Even though — Hollywood lore has it — the beer was warm, flat, and sprinkled with salt so it stayed foamy under the hot set lights.
Best Line: Coach: “Draw you a beer, Norm?” Norm: “No, I know what they look like. Just pour me one.”

(Photo: NBC)

Grace’s sometimes-assistant and all-the-time “pill-popping, jet-fuel-sniffing, gin-soaked narcissist,” Karen, would be a terrible friend but an amazing drinking companion. Though you might want to wait until after breakfast, when her beverage of choice is orange juice and vodka, hold the orange juice.
Best Line: “If you ever need someone to drink with, I’ll drink with you. If you ever need a shoulder to cry on, I’ll drink with you. I guess what I’m trying to say is: I love to drink!”

(Photo: NBC)

Even by the standards of the day, Don puts back a few too many. The first clue may have been vomiting at a funeral or punching a minister or maybe all that adultery. Is it wrong that we’d still rather hang out with drinking Don than sober Don?
Best Line: Roger: “They say once you start drinking alone, you’re an alcoholic. I’m really trying to avoid that.” Don: “So I guess I’m helping both of us.”

(Photo: AMC)

It’s not that the men in her life are the reason why she drinks, but it’s no coincidence that drama in her love life often precedes her relapses into alcoholism. Sometimes the best way to deal with it is just to talk it out after work at a bar.
Best Line: “Being able to have a casual drink with my friends just makes me feel like I’m past the bad part.”

(Photo: NBC)

The entire time that we’d spend sharing beers with him, we’d be kind of wanting him to not. He’s underage! But also, any guy willing to go to jail for his brother has probably earned the right. Right?
Best Line: “Motel’s right up here, but I figure we can get a drink first. Unless of course that’s against your religion.”

(Phoro: NBC)

Can you blame a bot for throwing back a few when he actually is powered by booze? There’s no definitive proof that his antisocial tendencies are the result of his alcoholism. Or his kleptomania. Or his womanizing. Or his pathologically… wait, why do we want to hang out with him?
Best Line: “I’m Bender, baby. Please insert liquor!”

(Photo: Fox)

It’s never a good idea to switch from your doctor-prescribed medication to self-medicating with booze. That being said, even drunk, there’s no one else we’d feel safer with during a terrorist attack.
Best Line: Brody: “You all right?” Carrie: “I’m half Irish.” Brody: “The Irish don’t puke?” Carrie: “Nah. Only when we have to salute the British.”

(Photo: Showtime)

Never without a martini in her hand, Lucille is not only witty and charming, but also she’s a criminal mastermind. Though you probably won’t want to be around her if you’re poor. Or middle class. Or Hispanic. Or Asian. Or not a family member. Or a family member, for that matter.
Best Line: “You’d have to wake up pretty early to be drunk by one o’clock!”

(Photo: Fox)

Sure, the guys and gals of Cougar Town drink enough wine to choke a horse, then pickle it in a vat full of more wine — but it’s not really about getting drunk. In their world, wine is kind of a metaphor for friendship. A metaphor best served in a glass larger than your head.
Best Line: Ellie: “Nothing could ever make me stop loving you, except you not drinking.”

(Photo: TBS)

We’d almost rather just hang around as Bobby Moynihan and Colin Jost sit around spitballing ideas as they write these sketches. It’s actually kind of awful to have an uncle who’s mostly incoherent and overly emotional and more than a tiny bit racist. But it’s wonderful to see him on Weekend Update.
Best Line: [Singing] “Get out of my glass! Get into my mouth!”

(Photo: NBC)

Nothing but the finest Glengoolie scotch for the world’s deadliest spy. Granted, the people around him are just as likely to die as his targets, but at least you’ll get an earful of the best action one-liners around before you bite it.
Best Line: “If I stop drinking all at once, I’m afraid the cumulative hangover will kill me.”

(Photo: FX)

Life can be rough when you’re married to a Texas oil magnate long considered the benchmark for evil on TV. Her alcoholism gets so bad, at one point she’s thrown into a sanitarium, which is terrible, yes, but it makes for some great drinking stories.
Best Line: [On not drinking while pregnant] “But it’s just so boring. I can’t do half the things I’m used to doin’. I’m just forced to be good, you know?”

(Photo: CBS)

Nobody has had to work harder to maintain a buzz than Col. Tigh: Stranded in space, the only alcohol the Colonial Fleet had was what they brought with them. And he’s great fun when he’s drinking, especially when he’s with his wife, Ellen. Just so long as you’re not a Cylon spy.
Best Line: “I’ll tell you the secret to avoid hangovers. Don’t stop drinking.”

(Photo: Syfy)

Sure, he let his baby son, Liam, be taken away by a loan shark because of his debt, and maybe he let a woman who needed a heart transplant die purely out of spite — but as long as it’s not our kid or our heart, he’d be pretty fun to be around.
Best Line: [To a fish] “Now you know what I feel like… Stop whining! Drink more.”

(Photo: Showtime)

Because he’s tortured by visions of horrors he’s seen on the job as a fireman, Tommy’s dance with alcoholism is, at times, heart-rending. But good luck getting him to stop; he once managed to get an entire AA meeting to fall off the wagon. If nothing else, he’ll make a believer of you.
Best Line: Tommy: “I changed. I quit drinking.” Dad: “That doesn’t mean you’ve changed. That means you’re a p–k.”

(Photo: FX)

Not that we’d ever insist somebody drink… but some people are more fun that way. Witness the turn from “Fun Bobby” to “Ridiculously Dull Bobby,” as Chandler calls him.
Best Line: “Whaddya say we make these coffees Irish?

(Photo: NBC)