When I set out to rewatch all seven Fast and Furious movies for the 100 best lines, I thought I’d be compiling a list of the best dialogue typically seen in action movies. While screenwriter Chris Morgan and company have treated us to many superb one-liners (usually delivered with gusto by Dwayne Johnson), they are not the only lines worthy of our attention.
Some dialogue was fantastic for how many ways they managed to make fun of the large head of Roman Pearce (Tyrese Gibson). Some were great now for how they haven’t aged particularly well (such as calling the Internet “the Web”). Best of all were many of the lines delivered by Dominic Toretto (Vin Diesel), for how blatantly nonsensical they were.
Before you go see The Fate of the Furious, which has several fantastic lines that will take their place in this hallowed list eventually, get psyched up for these, the dopest, most adrenaline-boosting (and silliest and weirdest and most outdated) lines from the first seven movies.
1. Fast Five — Dom: Money will come and go. We know that. Most important thing in life will always be the people in this room. Right here. Right now. Salud, mi familia.
2. Furious 7 — Hobbs: Daddy’s gotta go to work.
3. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman: Hey Mia, you better hide your baby oil. I’m just playing. Hobbs: You better hide that big-ass forehead. Roman: I was just joking, but whatever.
4. Furious 7 — Dom: You thought this was gonna be a street fight? You’re goddamn right it is.
5. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman: I’m sitting here looking at these images, it’s like we’re hunting our evil twins. I mean, look at this black dude right here. He’s handsome. Clearly that’s me. We got a white Hobbs, this is Han. Tej, it’s an African in a beanie. That’s like your Mini-Me, man. And Brian, when did you do this photoshoot? I’m just playing, man. You know you’re the prettiest blond around here.
6. Fast and Furious 6 — Hobbs: Toretto. I need you to know the moment we let him walk out that door with that chip, words like amnesty and pardon walk out with him. Dom: Those words went out the day we were born.
7. Furious 7 — Letty: Hey, did you bring the cavalry? Hobbs: Woman, I am the cavalry.
8. Fast Five — Han: Well, this is a bust. I’m not going to be able to get his fingerprints out here. I need to do some more recon, call in an extra couple guys. Gisele: Or, you don’t send a man to do a woman’s job.
9. Furious 7 — Letty [standing above a defeated guard]: Would you believe I knocked him out with my charm?
10. The Fast and the Furious — Dom: You can have any brew you want, as long as it’s a Corona.
11. The Fast and the Furious — Vince: What’s up with this fool? What is he? Sandwich crazy?
12. The Fast and the Furious — Dom: Ask any racer, any real racer. It don’t matter if you win by an inch or a mile. Winning’s winning.
13. Fast and Furious 6 — Brian: Even though she’s alive, maybe she’s gone. Dom: You don’t turn your back on family, even when they do.
14. Fast Five — Hobbs: Two things. One. I need a translator. Elena Neves. You heard me. Alemeida: But why? We have many more experienced men. Hobbs: I like her smile. Alemeida: What’s the second thing? Hobbs: Stay the f*** out of my way.
15. Furious 7 — Ramsey: Ex-cop, military, something like that. The way you took out them guys shows training. Tech guy, offended by the hacker remark, naturally. Alpha. Mrs. Alpha. Joker. Roman: Wrong. Double alpha. Man candy. You know what I’m saying?
16. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman: Father, thank you for the gathering of friends. Father, we give thanks for all the choices we’ve made, because that’s what makes us who we are. Let us forever cherish the loved ones we’ve lost along the way. And thank you for the little angel, the newest addition to our family. Thank you for bringing Letty home. And most of all, thank you for fast cars.
17. The Fast and the Furious — Dom: I live my life a quarter mile at a time.
18. Fast Five — Roman: How are you, sir? Special Agent O’Conner, U.S. Federal Bureau of Investigation. Guard: It says Caucasian. Roman: It’s a tan. You know, a tan?
19. Furious 7 — Dom: Thing about street fights, the street always wins.
20. 2 Fast 2 Furious — Brian: Stinking boats. Where are the cars?
21. Furious 7 — Roman: Seriously, if I don’t start making decisions, I’m out. Dom: All right, Roman. What do you got? Roman: I mean, I wasn’t trying to get into the whole leadership thing, like, now. You know what I’m saying? I was just, kind of, talking about, like, at some point. Like, you know, when we … whatever. I mean, I think … let’s hit it from here. Sheppard: I don’t think that… Roman: No, no, no, don’t think. That’s my job. Shush.
22. Fast Five — Roman: When are you going to give Martin Luther King his car back? Tej: As soon as you give Rick James his jacket back.
23. Furious 7 — Deckard [in prison]: You do know none of this will keep me, right? Hobbs: Well, once you dig through 38 feet of concrete and steel, my fist and a body bag will be waiting for you on the other side. So I suggest you get to digging, boy.
24. Furious 7 — Dom: Time to unleash the beast!
25. Fast and Furious 6 — Tej [as Elena and Letty meet each other]: This is gonna be awkward. Tej and Roman: But sexy as hell.
26. The Fast and the Furious — Edwin: You know, Edwin happens to know a few things, and one of the things Edwin knows is it’s not how you stand by your car, it’s how you race your car. You better learn that.
27. Furious 7 — Deckard: Agent Hobbs, right? Hobbs: That’s right. I’m also the last man whose computer you want to be hacking into. You just earned yourself a dance with the devil, boy.
28. Furious 7 — Hobbs: You sure as hell ain’t the IT guy, so you better start talking before I break that finger six different ways and stick it right where the sun doesn’t shine.
29. Fast and Furious 6 — Gisele: There’s one thing you boys are forgetting. He’s a man. Let’s go. Roman: “He’s a man.” Han: You know, she always says that.
30. Fast Five — Hobbs: Toretto. I’ll see you soon. Dom: No, you won’t.
31. Fast Five — Hobbs: I’m in. I’ll ride with you, Toretto. At least until we kill that son of a b****.
32. The Fast and the Furious — Dom: You can find anything on the Web. Anything about anybody. So why bulls***?
33. 2 Fast 2 Furious — Roman: Guns, murderers, and crooked cops? I was made for this, bruh!
34. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman: You better make sure you get her a big rock, man, because she don’t look like she’s that easily impressed. And if it’s not a big rock, you better be big somewhere else, you know what I’m talking about? Han: It’s why all of your girlfriends wear so much bling, huh?
35. Fast Five — Reyes: Help me. [Hobbs shoots Reyes] Hobbs: That’s for my team, you son of a b****.
36. 2 Fast 2 Furious — Roman: Verone pay ya’ll to keep a straight face like that? Because if I was making money, s***, I’d pay to get that mole removed off my damn nose.
37. Fast Five — [Gang members draw guns, Hobbs’s team draws guns, gang members put guns away] Hobbs: I thought so.
38. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman: Why do I smell baby oil? Hobbs: You keep running your pie hole, you’re going to smell an a** kicking.
39. Fast Five — Roman: Sexy legs, baby girl. What time do they open? Gisele: They open the same time as I pull this trigger. Want me to open them?
40. 2 Fast 2 Furious — Roman: Man, it’s so hot and humid out here I can’t even wear no drawers.
41. Furious 7 — Samantha: Dominic Toretto, right? My dad said he kicked your a** once.
42. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman: So now we got cars flying in the air? On some 007-type s***? This is not what we do! Tej: Man, you really got to check that emotion.Your voice just went from Shaggy to Scooby-Doo.
43. 2 Fast 2 Furious — Brian: How about them apples, man?
44. Fast Five — Roman: You say what? This just went from Mission Impossible to Mission Im-freaking-sanity!
45. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman: Can I have a little change? Tej: You’re a millionaire and you’re still trying to ask for money? Roman: It’s how you stay a millionaire.
46. Fast and Furious — Penning: O’Conner, do you know the difference between a crook and a criminal? One bad judgment call. Keep your s*** in line, son.
47. Fast Five — Russo: Good news, bad news. Hobbs: You know I like my dessert first.
48. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman: So who’s got a plan B? Tej: Plan B? We need a plan C, D, E … we need a new alphabet!
49. Fast and Furious — Brian: I lied to you. I lied to Dom. I lied to everybody. That’s what I do best. That’s why the Feds recruited me.
50. Fast Five — Neves: Something doesn’t add up. Toretto and O’Conner. They stay when they’re supposed to run, they steal gas, then give it away. Now they’re killing federal agents. It doesn’t make sense. Hobbs: Here’s what makes sense. [Tosses away files]
51. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman [holding up foreign currency]: Hey man, which one of these things is a dollar? [Hobbs shoots a vending machine, causing all the snacks to fall out] Hobbs: It’s on the house.
52. Fast and Furious — Dom [to Gisele]: I’m one of those boys that appreciates a fine body regardless of the make.
53. Fast and Furious 6 — Hobbs: The crew we’re after, they hit like thunder and disappear like smoke. You go in alone, and you won’t ever touch them. I’ve been chasing this guy over four continents and 12 countries and believe me, the last damn place I want to be right now is on your front doorstep selling Girl Scout cookies.
54. Fast and Furious 6 — Owen Shaw: Bloody fickle, that one. Dom: You want bloody? We can do bloody.
55. Furious 7 — Dom: He killed Han. Almost killed my family. Hobbs: He also tried to put me in a body bag too. Which is why when I get out, I’m gonna put a hurt on him so bad, he’s gonna wish his mama had kept her legs closed.
56. Fast Five — Santos: Ugly is still ugly in Spanish or in English.
57. Fast and Furious 6 — Brian: You heard him. But this is different. We’re not dealing with cops, we’re not dealing with drug dealers. This is a whole different level. Roman: We’re getting paid, right?
58. Furious 7 — Roman [talking about a curly haired woman to divert attention]: Some of y’all probably went to the bathroom and noticed that all the hairspray was missing. Yep. She did it. Thank you.
59. Fast Five — Roman [seeing Brian’s bright blue car]: Really? Where’d you get that from? Papa Smurf?
60. Fast Five — Roman: Swear to God, if you was on the other side of that glass, I’d bust your damn face in. Now, translate that.
61. Fast and Furious 6 — Tej: You’re right. Money has changed me. I realized that money doesn’t grow on trees. It rains from the sky!
62. Fast Five — Elena: Dom, listen to them. Run before it’s too late. Leave Rio. You can be free. Dom: Runnin’ ain’t freedom. You should know that.
63. The Fast and the Furious — Vince [seeing Brian in Dom’s house]: He’s got no call being up in here. You don’t know that fool for s***! Leon: Yeah, he’s right, Dom! Dom: Vince, there was a time when I didn’t know you! Vince: That was in the third grade!
64. The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift — Sean [to D.K.]: You’re like the Justin Timberlake of Japan, right?
65. Fast and Furious 6 — Dom: You’re going to make a great father, Brian. Brian: What makes you so sure? Dom: Because I’ll be there to kick your ass if you ain’t.
66. Fast Five — Dom [after they jump from their flying car into a reservoir]: You had to make a call, huh? S***ty call, O’Conner. S***ty call.
67. Fast Five — Vince: How does it feel? Brian: What’s that? Vince: To be on the other side of a wanted poster.
68. Fast Five — Hobbs: Mac, give me a crosscheck on Reyes, full specs. If he goes to the john, I want to know how many times he shakes it.
69. The Fast and the Furious — Brian: It’s just a matter of time until I win … Bilkins: You want time, buy the magazine.
70. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman [finding out that his casino trip with some ladies has been cancelled] : All right, so listen, ladies. There’s been a little change of plans. Something came up. You know that casino that I was telling ya’ll about? I’ve got some vouchers, to the buffet.
71. Fast and Furious 6 — Russian officer [as Hobbs beats up a suspect]: Is that legal? Riley: No. But are you going to go in there and tell him?
72. Fast Five — Roman: It’s done. See, I think I make a better special agent than you ever did. Brian: Well, that depends on how you define “special.”
73. Fast Five — [Hobbs drives his car into Dom’s.] Dom: You just made a big mistake.
74. The Fast and the Furious — Mia: V, what was that Cuban restaurant you wanted to take me to? The one with the picadillo and the … Vince: Little red candles, wooden table? Mia: Yeah, the plantain too. Vince: Yeah. Mia: Food all over the place, what was it called? Vince: Cha Cha Cha. Mia: Yeah, that’s it. Well, you can take me there. Friday night at 10, is that good for you? Brian: Yeah, it’s perfect. Mia: Good.
75. Fast and Furious 6 — Tej: But with cars, you have to customize. It’s all between you and the car you build. It’s a bond, it’s a commitment. Hobbs: It sounds like a marriage. Tej: Yeah, but with cars, when you trade up, they don’t take half your s***.
76. The Fast and the Furious — Dom [as Jesse is making out at a party]: Yo, Einstein, take it upstairs. You can’t detail a car with the cover on.
77. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman [pointing to a broken windshield]: That could have been my forehead, man! Tej: Nah, that’s not as big as your forehead.
78. The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift — Han: Life’s simple. You make choices and you don’t look back.
79. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman: Somebody better do something! I’ve got a tank on my as**!
80. Furious 7 — Brian: You know, the best decision I ever made was stepping into the store and buying that first sandwich. Mia: It was such a bad sandwich. Brian: I know, right? But I ate a lot of them.
81. The Fast and the Furious — Jesse [seeing Brian]: He’s beautiful. Leon: I like his haircut.
82. Fast Five — Roman: Dawg, you still can’t drive. Now I see why you’re always getting into accidents. You can’t even drive a damn remote control car.
83. The Fast and the Furious — Dom [to Brian, about Mia]: You break her heart, I break your neck.
84. Fast Five — Hobbs: The way I see it, you’ve earned yourselves 24 hours. The money stays, though. If I were you, I’d use the time. Make peace with whatever demons you got left. Because come tomorrow, I will find you.
85. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman [after both are defeated handily in a fight against Jah]n: No one needs to know about this. No one. [Han nods silently]
86. Fast Five — Vince: You never listen to me. Not when I told you he was a cop. Not now. You never trust me and look where it’s got us. Look at our family now. I can’t go home, your sister’s stuck in this life. Where’s Letty, Dom? Where’s Letty?
87. Fast and Furious 6 — Tej [seeing the plane Owen Shaw is trying to escape on]: Wow, you just had to open your mouth. Now we got a big-ass plane to deal with. Roman: That ain’t a plane. That’s a planet.
88. Fast Five — Santos: I know what I’m going to do with my money. Buying some cooking lessons for my man.
89. The Fast and the Furious — Mia: Tuna on white, no crust, right? Brian: I don’t know. How is it? Mia: Every day for the last three weeks, you’ve been coming in here and you’ve been asking me how the tuna is. Now, it was crappy yesterday, it was crappy the day before, and guess what? It hasn’t changed. Brian: I’ll have the tuna. Mia: No crust? Brian: No crust.
90. The Fast and the Furious — Mia [as Brian and Vince fight outside]: I’m not kidding, Dom! Get out there! Dom: What’d you put in that sandwich?
91. Fast and Furious — Dom: You got this? Letty: You bet your a**, bubba.
92. The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift — Twinkie: You know that real famous painting? The one of the woman who’s smiling all the time? Sean: The Mona Lisa. Twinkie: Right, right, right. Mona Lisa.
93. The Fast and the Furious — Brian [at a mansion turned covert police headquarters]: Wow, nice crib, Sergeant. It’s a lot nicer than that last place you confiscated. Tanner: Ain’t it? You know, Eddie Fisher built this house for Elizabeth Taylor in the ’50s. Brian: You see, even the cops are Hollywood in Hollywood.
94. Fast and Furious 6 — Stasiak [referring to Brian’s prison outfit]: The orange in that really makes your eyes pop.
95. Fast and Furious 6 — Hobbs: You’re talking about twin-turbo V-8, spitting out 560 ponies, son. Tej: He reads the brochure, I’m proud.
96. The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift — Clay: This beast’s got 500 horsepower and a Boria exhaust system. It does 0 to 60 in like 4.3 seconds. Sean: Wow! You can read the brochure.
97. Fast and Furious — Stasiak: Your boy Toretto’s red Chevelle’s been spotted in his old neighborhood. I’m going to bring his a** in. Brian: Not in your car, you’re not.
98. Fast Five — Santos: Two to one says you blow the wrong pipe. Leo: Yo, why you got to be so negative all the time, man? Santos: I ain’t negative. I’m just positive you’re going to mess it up.
99. Fast and Furious — Brian: Letty was my friend too. Dom: You weren’t anyone’s friend.
100. Fast and Furious 6 — Roman: Man, I’ve been known to handle big guns, relax. Tej: You’ve been known to handle that big-a** head.
Watch: A Quick Refresher on What Happened in Furious 7:
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