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    Maya Hope's Mom

    Maya Hope's Mom

  • Parenting Guru - Messiness is Relative

    The other night I told my four-year old daughter that dinner would be ready soon and it was time to pick up her toys.

  • Parenting Guru: Costume Envy (What Would Freud Say?)

    <p> Paging Dr. Freud. I'm ready to admit something. I've suffered from "costume envy" my whole life. </p> <p> My earliest memory of the problem was when I was five, fighting tears as my Mom presented me with a flimsy store bought black cat costume with angry-cat mask. The material was cheap, the mask hideous. The real issue was my older sister, looking resplendent in her bride costume. White dress, white veil, it was so unfair! She looked angelic and I looked like a rabid alley cat! </p> <br> You'd think I'd be happy when, two years later, the beautiful bridal outfit now fit me. But then my sister shows up, twirling in a wild and colorful gypsy skirt, blouse and scarf ensemble. She was adorned with Mom's costume jewelry and got to wear lots of colorful make-up, gypsy-style. How bland and boring I now felt in the hand-me-down bridal get-up. <br> <br> <br> My mother threw up her hands, exasperated. <br> <br> <br> My costume envy continued in subsequent years. I tried home-made costumes that failed, store bought costumes that always seemed "so last year," all the while watching peers come up with the most imaginative ideas. One year I was hopeful when my fourth grade class collectively entered a school costume contest as a parade of bloody mummies. Then out came the fifth graders, flaunting their clever group costume as a colorful deck of playing cards. Grr! <br> <br> <br> And then, in my mid-20s, it all changed. I finally won an office Halloween costume contest. The talk of the day was about Lady Diana's upcoming marriage to Prince Charles. My name is Diana, so I went for it, donning a flouncy magenta gown and tiara, waving a scepter. But I added a picture of Prince Charles to the center of the tiara with a red "no" circle symbol over his face. (I must have sensed future marriage woes.) The blue ribbon was mine. <br> <br> <br> After this sweet victory, my costume envy went away and I lost interest in Halloween costume parties, content to pass out candy and smile at kids. If I was inspired, I'd toss on your basic witch hat. <br> <br> <br> In recent years, parenthood has helped me get excited about Halloween costumes once again. When a friend gave me "babies first Halloween" pumpkin pajamas, I was tickled. The next year my husband got her a bumble bee outfit (sentimental as he called her "baby B") and we grinned at her like giddy fools. <br> <br> <br> Do I fret these days about getting Maya the most clever costume, comparing her getup to what the other little tykes are wearing? Thankfully, no. Maya chooses her inspiration each year and I just go along for the ride. She has requested some store bought numbers (Simba, Peter Pan) and one goofy mix of dress up clothes and makeup so she could be a "pink fairy princess." That year, I decided to dress up too and went for the cheetah look. We had a blast. <br> <br> <br> I'm relieved my costume envy is clearly gone, replaced by the fun of trick-or-treating with one happy little girl. By the way, this year she's obsessed with being Dracula for reasons I can't quite fathom, but we'll go for it; not every girl wants to dress up as a bride or a gypsy.

  • Parenting Guru: This Says Summer To Me

    Summer happiness this year was seeing my daughter in her swimsuit, hunkered down by the lake's edge to feel the water lapping at her toes, digging for treasures with her trusty shovel and pail. When it comes to summer, kids seem to understand that exploring the world at their feet can be the best vi

  • Parenting Guru: Swim Class Diaries

    Friday, July 1. Dear Diary: I finally chose a local swim school for Maya to start lessons. I wish we had started earlier, but she's still young, not quite four. She has loved playing in pools with us on vacations so far. Hopefully this will be a great adventure for her!

  • Parenting Guru: Places claimed by feelings

    American artist, author and conservationist Allan Gussow once observed that "the catalyst that converts any physical location - any environment if you will - into a place is the process of experiencing deeply. A place is a piece of the whole environment that has been claimed by feelings."

  • Parenting Guru: Muddy hills, banana slugs and raccoons, oh my!

    While we're huge fans of Disneyland vacations, three visits have led to our daughter's obsession with the place. We want to show her that family fun can involve relatively affordable days and nights communing with nature, without a theme ride, hotel or souvenir store in sight. A family camping trip

  • Parenting Guru: My Mother's Day Wish -- To Be Around for My Daughter

    There's a lot of hustle and bustle going on this week around Mother's Day. I'm racing to get cards and gifts for all the Moms in my life, planning visits with Grandmas and the like. Yet this morning I found myself focused on what I really want for Mother's Day:

  • Parenting Guru – Pre-school Lessons: Not Just for Kids

    My daughter, age three and a half, has learned a lot in pre-school this year (thank you amazing teachers; you rock). The class has covered, among other topics, the alphabet, numbers, opposites, colors, animals, and interesting bits of geography. Maya can tell me a dozen facts about spiders now and explain the merits of composting and vegetable gardens. We are pleased with the curriculum and all she's learning.

  • Parenting Guru: Bringing Italy to Mom

    My mother dreamed of traveling to Italy since she was a small girl. She grew up in a bilingual household with Italian parents and Nona who spoke no English. Her childhood was filled with the scents and tastes of regional dishes from Northern Italy, and the sounds of Italian arias and Neapolitan folk

  • Parenting Guru: Planes, Trains and Automobiles (with kids)

    As the official vacation coordinator in our house, many of my travel planning meltdowns have centered around "transportation firsts" for our daughter -- her first plane ride, first train ride, and first long distance car ride. Having now survived each of these, I can share lessons my husband and I learned about kid travel with each mode of transportation:

  • Parenting Guru - Avoiding Teeth Nightmares & Embracing Tooth Fairies

    When invited to write about our parenting experiences around the tooth fairy scene, my first thought was "I have nothing to say yet. Maya's teeth haven't started wiggling."

  • Parenting Guru - Ten things I love about our adoption journey

    My husband and I are "late bloomers" who met, fell in love and married in our early 40s. Our timing contributed to fertility challenges when we tried to start a family. Discussions about kids and family goals often ended with the same defeated conclusion: "perhaps parenthood is not in the cards for us."

  • Parenting Guru: My top thumbs down/thumbs up parenting moments of 2010

    New Years typically inspires people to reflect on the year just passed. This holiday I found myself reflecting on two kinds of parenting moments that left an impression on me: 1) those moments that make you flinch, wince, or basically give yourself a big thumbs down, and 2) those moments that leave

  • User post: To Santa Pic or Not To Santa Pic

    I did it. Again. I swore I wouldn't. I promised myself for the second year of my three year-old daughter's life that if she didn't want to sit on Santa's lap, she was not going to sit on Santa's lap.Here's this year's pic. Gawd. Tell me I'm not one of those Moms.

  • Parenting Guru: Dancing the Holiday/Birthday Mambo

    I have always felt a little sorry for people with December birthdays. A day that should be special for the individual too often takes a back seat to the hustle and bustle of the holidays.

  • Food Issues? At Thanksgiving?

    With family and food being two of my favorite things in life, it figures that I love Thanksgiving. Yet every year at this time, I realize anew that I have issues -- food issues, to be exact -- with this holiday. Here are the main ones (there's more, but I'll spare you):

  • User post: When the stand-in-mom alarm sounds

    This morning on the way to work, I passed two boys -- I'm guessing 8 and 10 -- with their bikes on the sidewalk. The younger boy was flat on the ground with his toppled bike, crying. The other was standing over him, talking into a cell phone, looking completely rattled.I drove past them slowly, hesi

  • Parenting Guru: Is Thanksgiving about Happy Things?

    Every Thursday at my house is "Maya and Mommy day," the day when my daughter and I are excused from the rigors of preschool and work, respectively. We make the most of it, playing, baking, exploring, and talking -- a lot. These Thursday conversations often get me thinking. Today was no exception.

  • The Happiness Tree?

    The Crape Myrtle is one of my favorite trees, so I am pleased that one graces the front yard of our home. It has a full crown of green leaves and lush fuchsia blooms during spring and summer. It follows up each autumn with a fiery fall display. In winter, even the bare branches look interesting agai

  • What's wrong with blue shoes?

    I don't claim to be a fashion maven. If you see my "Mother of a 3-year old" ensemble on any given day, that point will be self-evident. Nor am I normally neurotic about how my three-year old daughter should dress, either. Yet this morning, I found myself in a ridiculous debate with Maya about her ch